For as long as I can remember, I've been a Vandoren reed person. And for the last few years, specifically the V-12 variety. But I have always been open to other things. I've been known to play on Gonzalez reeds from time to time...they are pretty good, but I don't think that I would ever perform on them, I only use them for practice. They play nice, but my Vandoren's are just a step above in tone and response. Anywho...last week I decided to order, on the recommendation of my teacher, a new (to me anyway) brand of Rico. And normally, the name Rico sends shivers down my spine (flashback to students honking away on the popcicle sticks they call reeds....eek!) but I decided to try a box. This isn't the first time I have given Rico a chance; a couple years ago I tried the Rico Reserves, the local music store gave them to me to try (Thanks Boomers!). I hated them, haha. But I still wanted to give these new Rico's a chance, especially because my teacher had liked them. They are called Rico Grand Concert Select Evolution. There are three types of the Concert Select brand, and the Evolution is the most expensive (which I took as being the top kind). I figured that I should try the nicest kind to get a good feel for the Concert Selects.
In general, the Rico reeds were ok. They played pretty well, but the response was a little off. I think that I could have gone with a 5 strength instead of a 4.5 strength they felt a little soft and chirpy. Basically it still felt like I was playing a Rico reed, even when I moved the reed up on the mouthpiece. My high notes were much flatter than normal, and VERY unstable in the more extreme altissimo (notes that are almost always stable on my normal setup) Even when I compared the Rico to the Vandoren up in the light, you could see the difference between them. The tubuoles (or whatever they are, you all know what I'm talking about) were very skinny, dense and compact in the Vandoren, and in the Rico they were much more spread out and thicker. Obviously, the cane in the Vandoren is superior, and that's why it plays so much better. I really don't think that I will be ordering another box of the Selects.
I also ordered a box of Zonda reeds, but they were backordered so they won't be here for another week or so (or more). I'm interested to see how those compare to my precious V-12's (LOL) I have heard good things about this brand, and this particular box includes five hand chosen reeds.
I'm certainly not an equipment person, just give me a good mouthpiece (although I am a fan of the Zinner blanks!), ligature, and a responsive reed and I'll be fine. But I am enjoying exploring the difference between reed brands, especially since I've been playing on the same brand for over a decade. Its nice to see what is out there!
November 24, 2009
November 13, 2009
a day of realizations
Maybe this will be the last time I will ever take an audition on Friday the 13th. I am writing this from my hotel room in Charleston, West Virginia after a horrible day. The audition today is making me question whether or not this is all worth it, which is the first time I have ever seriously felt that way. After I got out of the audition, I just wanted to cry, and indeed I had to hold back tears until I was out of the building.
I was feeling fine this morning, but as I was getting ready to go to the audition site, I had this nagging feeling that today would not be a good day for me. And I was right. I'm not going to go into too much detail on the actual audition, except for the fact that I had three start-overs because I could not focus for some reason. And the funny thing was that I was completely focused about a half hour prior, it just dissolved for some reason.
I am so frustrated mostly because I have been seeing the same people at the last few auditions and the same people are making it through the prelims. Why can't I have that same consistency????? I don't know. It makes me extremely upset. I've broken down and cried several times today. Today something just broke in me and I just thought to myself I cannot keep doing this to myself. Its too stressful. I'm wasting my time and money. So I've made a decision. I'm going to take the President's Own audition in January, and I will either win the job or I am going to take an extended hiatus from auditions. I just can't do it anymore. I need a break.
Now, two months from now, I may well have changed my mind. But I don't think that will happen. This is the first time I do not have any sense of moving forward. I don't want to take the next audition. But I think I would regret not doing the Marine band audition, so that is why I am still planning on taking that one.
While talking to my sister this afternoon I realized how much pressure that I do put on myself in these auditions. I'm sure that is a direct cause of why I seem to spectacularly fail so much. I think a break from auditioning will give me time to: 1. get better at the clarinet, I need to focus on that instead of devoting so much time to focusing on getting better at excerpts; 2. network more, get my name and sound out there both in playing and teaching, this is something I have put minimal effort into. I think I put so much pressure on myself during auditions because I don't have much else going on in my career. Just imagine if I were consistently gigging and teaching; obviously the pressure for me to win an audition would be much less because I wouldn't need it so badly.
Now please note: I am not planning to take a break from clarinet. I love playing, and I look forward everyday to come home and practice. I just need a break from this constant state of preparing excerpts. I have taken a major audition every 2-3 months for the past 14 months. I just counted on my fingers....9 auditions in that time frame. I'm feeling even more mentally exhausted after thinking about that lol! I want to play more etudes, and more recital music! I think it may be fun to prepare a recital, and maybe play for friends here in Rochester before we move away and also play for my family and friends back in Colorado. Many of them haven't heard me play in years! It may be a fun and challenging task.
Well I'm going to go to bed now. I may divulge the details of today's audition at a later time, when I don't feel like I'm going to break down. I really need to get some sleep, I have a long day of driving ahead of me tomorrow!
I was feeling fine this morning, but as I was getting ready to go to the audition site, I had this nagging feeling that today would not be a good day for me. And I was right. I'm not going to go into too much detail on the actual audition, except for the fact that I had three start-overs because I could not focus for some reason. And the funny thing was that I was completely focused about a half hour prior, it just dissolved for some reason.
I am so frustrated mostly because I have been seeing the same people at the last few auditions and the same people are making it through the prelims. Why can't I have that same consistency????? I don't know. It makes me extremely upset. I've broken down and cried several times today. Today something just broke in me and I just thought to myself I cannot keep doing this to myself. Its too stressful. I'm wasting my time and money. So I've made a decision. I'm going to take the President's Own audition in January, and I will either win the job or I am going to take an extended hiatus from auditions. I just can't do it anymore. I need a break.
Now, two months from now, I may well have changed my mind. But I don't think that will happen. This is the first time I do not have any sense of moving forward. I don't want to take the next audition. But I think I would regret not doing the Marine band audition, so that is why I am still planning on taking that one.
While talking to my sister this afternoon I realized how much pressure that I do put on myself in these auditions. I'm sure that is a direct cause of why I seem to spectacularly fail so much. I think a break from auditioning will give me time to: 1. get better at the clarinet, I need to focus on that instead of devoting so much time to focusing on getting better at excerpts; 2. network more, get my name and sound out there both in playing and teaching, this is something I have put minimal effort into. I think I put so much pressure on myself during auditions because I don't have much else going on in my career. Just imagine if I were consistently gigging and teaching; obviously the pressure for me to win an audition would be much less because I wouldn't need it so badly.
Now please note: I am not planning to take a break from clarinet. I love playing, and I look forward everyday to come home and practice. I just need a break from this constant state of preparing excerpts. I have taken a major audition every 2-3 months for the past 14 months. I just counted on my fingers....9 auditions in that time frame. I'm feeling even more mentally exhausted after thinking about that lol! I want to play more etudes, and more recital music! I think it may be fun to prepare a recital, and maybe play for friends here in Rochester before we move away and also play for my family and friends back in Colorado. Many of them haven't heard me play in years! It may be a fun and challenging task.
Well I'm going to go to bed now. I may divulge the details of today's audition at a later time, when I don't feel like I'm going to break down. I really need to get some sleep, I have a long day of driving ahead of me tomorrow!
November 8, 2009
something that made me smile.
Yesterday, I taught a lesson to this really cute little 10 year old girl. She is very enthusiastic about playing clarinet, but often gets distracted because she is enthusiastic about everything! So most of the time I spend trying to get her re-focused on clarinet. But overall she is a good student. We usually play duets the last 10 minutes or so of the lesson, and she has taken a liking to one particular duet, which she insists on playing every week. That is fine with me, I'm not one to tell what she does or doesn't like to play. But this week, she decided that she wanted to make new dynamic markings on this particular duet. I said, sure! So I let her go to town, and she got so creative. She even created specific dynamic markings for each part. It was just so refreshing to see her get her creative juices flowing and really think about the music, not just the notes that are on the page. And she was having so much fun doing it! It was really great. I mean I already had a great day with a lesson with Mr. Grant, and coffee with a friend, but that was just icing on the cake. This is why I like to teach, for moments like that!!
November 7, 2009
ohhhhhhh......Daphnis.
Is is just me or is the Daphnis & Chloe excerpt the hardest excerpt ever? It seems like every time I have to prepare it I think to myself..."did I really play this at tempo before??", because I have, but everytime I have to go back to it I feel like I'm starting over. My fingers just don't move that fast, especially the first page. My fingers rebel and cramp up after the 2nd or 3rd repetition of the pattern. Grrr.....
I've got a pretty good practice routine for the last 2 pages of the excerpt, I just take one 16th note group at a time and play each one at a crazy speed (right now I do it at quarter=180), then I go back and do the whole thing @ 120, then I try it at tempo, but right now 160 is about my limit. I am hoping that I can speed that up closer to 168 this week. Now for the first page, I really don't know how to practice it, it seems no matter what my technique is for practicing it, it never gets any better or easier.
The only thing that keeps me somewhat going with that excerpt is I think about the first time I ever had to play it in an audition. It was my audition for DePaul university for my masters degree in 2006, and it was seriously terrible. I had slaved over the thing for 3 months and still could barely play it. I think now how much better I can play it and it makes me feel much better, lol!!
Lately I've been feeling pretty down lately, I feel like I should be doing more musical jobs....I feel like I have the talent for it, it is just really difficult to make others realize that. Especially teaching, I really wish I had more students. I'm actually wondering if it would be worth it to go back to school and get my teacher license so that I can get a job teaching at a school. Mostly because I'll probably make more money than I am right now. That's right, MORE money. I make so little money working as a secretary that a teachers salary looks mighty appetizing. I might actually be able to pay my student loans payments! But I don't even know where to start. It might be something to consider if Ben and I move, then I could get a job more easily. We will see I suppose.
I have also been toying with the idea of going back to school for my DMA. As much as it pains me to think about going back, it may be a smart move for my career. I've been looking at programs, I think I would definitely apply for Rice (although the application is REALLY tough), and UNC (that's Northern Colorado, not North Carolina) and study with Bil Jackson. But only if it really doesn't work out for Ben and his DMA, I want to give him a chance to get his degree first. I think that after Ben is done, I definitely will be getting a DMA, unless I have a good performance career going. So many variables!
It looks like no matter what happens with Ben's DMA applications, we will be moving out of Rochester. The tuba teacher at UNC (now I mean North Carolina - which is where he wants to go, but there aren't any spots open for next year) has offered to possibly work with Ben for a year until he graduates someone if none of the other programs he applies for works out. That would be the best option for me I think, there seems to be more playing and audition opportunities out here on the East coast. The other option (so far) is LA, which has good opportunities I'm sure, I'm just not really aware of them.
Sometimes I get so frustrated with how difficult this profession is. I have to remember how much I love doing what I do, and that I wouldn't trade it for anything. Because once I get the job, it will be worth all the struggle! At least that's what people tell me....
I've got a pretty good practice routine for the last 2 pages of the excerpt, I just take one 16th note group at a time and play each one at a crazy speed (right now I do it at quarter=180), then I go back and do the whole thing @ 120, then I try it at tempo, but right now 160 is about my limit. I am hoping that I can speed that up closer to 168 this week. Now for the first page, I really don't know how to practice it, it seems no matter what my technique is for practicing it, it never gets any better or easier.
The only thing that keeps me somewhat going with that excerpt is I think about the first time I ever had to play it in an audition. It was my audition for DePaul university for my masters degree in 2006, and it was seriously terrible. I had slaved over the thing for 3 months and still could barely play it. I think now how much better I can play it and it makes me feel much better, lol!!
Lately I've been feeling pretty down lately, I feel like I should be doing more musical jobs....I feel like I have the talent for it, it is just really difficult to make others realize that. Especially teaching, I really wish I had more students. I'm actually wondering if it would be worth it to go back to school and get my teacher license so that I can get a job teaching at a school. Mostly because I'll probably make more money than I am right now. That's right, MORE money. I make so little money working as a secretary that a teachers salary looks mighty appetizing. I might actually be able to pay my student loans payments! But I don't even know where to start. It might be something to consider if Ben and I move, then I could get a job more easily. We will see I suppose.
I have also been toying with the idea of going back to school for my DMA. As much as it pains me to think about going back, it may be a smart move for my career. I've been looking at programs, I think I would definitely apply for Rice (although the application is REALLY tough), and UNC (that's Northern Colorado, not North Carolina) and study with Bil Jackson. But only if it really doesn't work out for Ben and his DMA, I want to give him a chance to get his degree first. I think that after Ben is done, I definitely will be getting a DMA, unless I have a good performance career going. So many variables!
It looks like no matter what happens with Ben's DMA applications, we will be moving out of Rochester. The tuba teacher at UNC (now I mean North Carolina - which is where he wants to go, but there aren't any spots open for next year) has offered to possibly work with Ben for a year until he graduates someone if none of the other programs he applies for works out. That would be the best option for me I think, there seems to be more playing and audition opportunities out here on the East coast. The other option (so far) is LA, which has good opportunities I'm sure, I'm just not really aware of them.
Sometimes I get so frustrated with how difficult this profession is. I have to remember how much I love doing what I do, and that I wouldn't trade it for anything. Because once I get the job, it will be worth all the struggle! At least that's what people tell me....
November 3, 2009
need to write more often...
So I haven't been very good about writing in this blog...I meant to write almost every day but obviously that hasn't really happened. I've just been so busy lately....I am now full time at my job, so that means I'm at work from 8-4:30 every day, and I'm taking a tax prep course twice a week, plus teaching 2 students a week, plus playing in the music educators band. I haven't even had any time to go swim! Luckily things are starting to slow down, I don't have music educators band anymore until January, and soon the tax prep class will be over so I'll have my Monday and Thursday nights back.
So I've been extremely confused lately about auditions and stuff. There are just too many in the coming months. It took me forever to just buckle down and decide to do the Pershing's own audition. Too bad I made the decision 3 weeks past the application deadline!!! Oops. And in the same day I discovered that, I also discovered that I may not be eligible for the President's own Marine band. Some small mistakes that I have made in the past possibly may disqualify me for the security clearance required to work at the white house. Two hits in one day, which made me think, ok now what am I going to do about auditions? So about a week and a half ago I made the decision to take the West Virginia symphony audition on November 13th. So that gave me about 3 weeks to prepare this audition!! The repertoire isn't too bad, the only hairy excerpt is Daphnis. The 13th actually lands on a Friday (friday the 13th!!!), and I'm only taking that day off of work, so I've decided to drive down to West Virginia (its about 8 hours) right after I get off of work on Thursday. It might suck a lot, I will not get to my destination until after midnight. But I don't have to check in for my audition until 11:30, so I can sleep in a bit. I checked plane tickets...there really isn't anything that is under $400, which is slightly rediculous because of how close Charleston, WV is...whatever.
I think I'm excited about this audition. I haven't really had time to think about it, because I'm mostly like, holy crap I have to get Daphnis ready in 2 weeks!!, but this would be a great job to get. They pay for travel up to 1000 miles round trip!! I live 480 miles away from Charleston, so it would be perfect. So I hope I can do well.
This week I've gotta focus and really put clarinet first before anything else, which has been hard to do lately. I've just got to remind myself that all this hard work will pay off someday! At least working my 9-5 job really makes me motivated to practice and get a real job!
So I've been extremely confused lately about auditions and stuff. There are just too many in the coming months. It took me forever to just buckle down and decide to do the Pershing's own audition. Too bad I made the decision 3 weeks past the application deadline!!! Oops. And in the same day I discovered that, I also discovered that I may not be eligible for the President's own Marine band. Some small mistakes that I have made in the past possibly may disqualify me for the security clearance required to work at the white house. Two hits in one day, which made me think, ok now what am I going to do about auditions? So about a week and a half ago I made the decision to take the West Virginia symphony audition on November 13th. So that gave me about 3 weeks to prepare this audition!! The repertoire isn't too bad, the only hairy excerpt is Daphnis. The 13th actually lands on a Friday (friday the 13th!!!), and I'm only taking that day off of work, so I've decided to drive down to West Virginia (its about 8 hours) right after I get off of work on Thursday. It might suck a lot, I will not get to my destination until after midnight. But I don't have to check in for my audition until 11:30, so I can sleep in a bit. I checked plane tickets...there really isn't anything that is under $400, which is slightly rediculous because of how close Charleston, WV is...whatever.
I think I'm excited about this audition. I haven't really had time to think about it, because I'm mostly like, holy crap I have to get Daphnis ready in 2 weeks!!, but this would be a great job to get. They pay for travel up to 1000 miles round trip!! I live 480 miles away from Charleston, so it would be perfect. So I hope I can do well.
This week I've gotta focus and really put clarinet first before anything else, which has been hard to do lately. I've just got to remind myself that all this hard work will pay off someday! At least working my 9-5 job really makes me motivated to practice and get a real job!
October 12, 2009
Youngstown symphony
Last night I auditioned for the Youngstown Symphony in Ohio. It was an interesting experience, mostly because I found out what happens when an orchestra does not plan its audition days very well. Yesterday they not only auditioned for 2nd clarinet, but they auditioned for violin, viola, bassoon and oboe/english horn. I'm sorry, but if you have any sort of common sense, you would not schedule all those auditions in one day!!!! But they did, and they didn't start the auditions until noon.
So the clarinets were the last group of instruments to go. We were supposed to show up at 5pm to draw numbers, and the first one would go at 5:45. Well obviously that didn't happen, they were way behind. Surprise, surprise. In fact, the oboes had not even started yet when I showed up at 5! I ended up drawing #14. There was no common warm up room, so I sat waiting for a good hour and a half before I even got led back to a room so I could start warming up. It was ok, I got to chat with some people and read my book and try to focus.
I think I ended up going around 8:30ish. The excerpts in the prelim round was Mozart, Rachmaninov 2, Beethoven 6 2nd movt, and Mendelssohn scherzo. No real surprises there. The proctor said as I was going in that we would play the Mozart then the Rachmaninov and if they were interested in more they would ask for the other excerpts. I played the Mozart pretty well, but then I completely squawked the high D in the Rach 2. I was like, whatev, finish the excerpt and hope that they ask for that spot again. They did, fortunately, but it wasn't completely clean. Poop. But they let me go on to the Beethoven, woohoo! And then they let me go on to the Scherzo, which I played so-so. Definitely not my best scherzo, hehe. I did walk out feeling like I could have played better....which made me think I probably would not make it. I think if I had aced the repeat of the Rach and the scherzo I would have made it through for sure.
So, they had made some cuts after #12 had gone, so I still had awhile before they made the next cut. 2 people had made it through to the next round from the first group of players. Fast forward an hour and a half, after everyone was finished...they announced 4 numbers that had advanced...mine was not one of them (not surprising to me). But then they say that the committee had changed their minds about the two players who had advanced in the first group and decided that they didn't want to hear them again. The look on their faces was utter confusion! Immediately I was so pissed for them! I couldn't believe that the committee had the audacity to pull something like that. I mean, these two had been waiting around for at least 2 1/2 hours to play another round. What a blatant display of disrespect. I lost all respect that I had for the committee. How incredibly unprofessional.
The interesting thing is that I overheard someone telling a story about an audition with Youngstown SO a couple years ago, when the same situation unfolded. The auditions were running extremely late, so the committee sent people home that had initially advanced, without hearing them again. So apparently this must be a common practice for them. Well, maybe you should plan better for your auditions so they don't run so late, and everyone can have a fair chance!!!
All in all, I'm glad I didn't advance. Not only did I not want to have anything to do with the orchestra after what they did to those two players, I still had a four hour drive home!!!! I left Youngstown at 10:30, so I didn't get back to Rochester until 2:30....yuck! And I had to work this morning at 8am. So......I'm tired. I'm going to take a couple days off from practicing, and then I'm going to start working on the next audition...Marine Band, yay! So excited for that audition in January. Now I'm going to bed!
So the clarinets were the last group of instruments to go. We were supposed to show up at 5pm to draw numbers, and the first one would go at 5:45. Well obviously that didn't happen, they were way behind. Surprise, surprise. In fact, the oboes had not even started yet when I showed up at 5! I ended up drawing #14. There was no common warm up room, so I sat waiting for a good hour and a half before I even got led back to a room so I could start warming up. It was ok, I got to chat with some people and read my book and try to focus.
I think I ended up going around 8:30ish. The excerpts in the prelim round was Mozart, Rachmaninov 2, Beethoven 6 2nd movt, and Mendelssohn scherzo. No real surprises there. The proctor said as I was going in that we would play the Mozart then the Rachmaninov and if they were interested in more they would ask for the other excerpts. I played the Mozart pretty well, but then I completely squawked the high D in the Rach 2. I was like, whatev, finish the excerpt and hope that they ask for that spot again. They did, fortunately, but it wasn't completely clean. Poop. But they let me go on to the Beethoven, woohoo! And then they let me go on to the Scherzo, which I played so-so. Definitely not my best scherzo, hehe. I did walk out feeling like I could have played better....which made me think I probably would not make it. I think if I had aced the repeat of the Rach and the scherzo I would have made it through for sure.
So, they had made some cuts after #12 had gone, so I still had awhile before they made the next cut. 2 people had made it through to the next round from the first group of players. Fast forward an hour and a half, after everyone was finished...they announced 4 numbers that had advanced...mine was not one of them (not surprising to me). But then they say that the committee had changed their minds about the two players who had advanced in the first group and decided that they didn't want to hear them again. The look on their faces was utter confusion! Immediately I was so pissed for them! I couldn't believe that the committee had the audacity to pull something like that. I mean, these two had been waiting around for at least 2 1/2 hours to play another round. What a blatant display of disrespect. I lost all respect that I had for the committee. How incredibly unprofessional.
The interesting thing is that I overheard someone telling a story about an audition with Youngstown SO a couple years ago, when the same situation unfolded. The auditions were running extremely late, so the committee sent people home that had initially advanced, without hearing them again. So apparently this must be a common practice for them. Well, maybe you should plan better for your auditions so they don't run so late, and everyone can have a fair chance!!!
All in all, I'm glad I didn't advance. Not only did I not want to have anything to do with the orchestra after what they did to those two players, I still had a four hour drive home!!!! I left Youngstown at 10:30, so I didn't get back to Rochester until 2:30....yuck! And I had to work this morning at 8am. So......I'm tired. I'm going to take a couple days off from practicing, and then I'm going to start working on the next audition...Marine Band, yay! So excited for that audition in January. Now I'm going to bed!
September 13, 2009
Erie Phil Audition
Finally! Success!! Well sort of, I got runner up at the Erie Phil audition on Thursday. It was awesome, I don't think I've EVER played so well at an audition before!! And it was the first orchestral audition that I've made it past the prelims. It was exactly what I needed, especially after the disappointments that I have had over the last few months. It makes me feel like I am actually pursuing the right profession.
The audition was later in the afternoon, which was nice. I took the whole day off of work, so I actually got to sleep in! I definitely appreciate sleeping past 7am now that I work at 8 every day. I carpooled with a friend, and we ended up getting to Erie (which is about 3 hours away from Rochester) about an hour early. So we just went and ate and relaxed a bit. The order of the preliminary round was determined by who got there, so we didn't want to get there too early!
I ended up being #9, which was right in the middle. I was pretty nervous, but I tried to focus my brain by reading a book and breathing deeply. It totally worked! This is something I have been struggling with for the last 3 or 4 auditions. When I went in to the audition room (which was on stage of an auditorium), I made sure to take 3 deep breaths and focused on getting rid of the "bad stuff". It really worked, I was able to play relaxed and confidently. The first round was Mozart, Shostakovich 9 3rd movement, and Beethoven 6 second movement. I played the Mozart and the Beethoven really well, but I was a little wary of the Shosty. The excerpt for the Shostakovich was actually past where I had practiced (it ended up being from the beginning of the movement to 9 bars after B!) so I was frantically practicing that part while I was warming up! Luckily they did give us the prelim excerpts in the warm up room. I still completely faked that excerpt, because it really isn't a good excerpt for me. I first played it waaaaaaaay too fast. But then the committee saved me and asked me to play it again a bit slower. Thank you! It was much cleaner the 2nd time, but there was a lot of faking still going on hehe.
Well apparently it sounded good to the committee because they asked for me to play again in the 2nd round, along with 5 or 6 others. I ended up being first in the order, which ended up being good, because I wasn't able to get nervous again. I was much more calm in the 2nd round, for sure, but I still took deep breaths before I played each excerpt. I played Pines of Rome and Mendelssohn scherzo in the second round, it was for sure my best round of the day. I used paper underneath my register key for Pines, which made it easier to maintain the soft A. It was nice.
When they announced the results of the 2nd round, I was still thinking that I was #9 for some reason although my number was now #1. So when the proctor announced that the committee wanted to hear #1 and #5 again, I was like, damn! Because I thought I hadn't made it because I was #9 haha!!! It wasn't until my friend high fived me that I remembered I was #1!! I can be so blonde sometimes.
So it was down to me and this other guy, Michael, who was from Cleveland. I just went in there and played as well as I could possibly. The excerpts were Shostakovich 9 2nd movement, and Petroushka Peasant and the Bear (!!). I tried to play as out of the box as possible, but I may have played the Shostakovitch too slow and the Stravinsky to loud because they ended up choosing the other guy as the winner. But thats ok! They asked if I would be interested in subbing because they loved my playing. I said YESSSSSS! So I hope that they call me sometime this year, I need some experience!! I really needed to do well at this audition to boost my confidence. The last 6 months or so I have been on somewhat of a downward spiral as far as my playing. I'm glad that my hard work is finally paying off!
Next audition will be Youngstown Symphony in October. I'm still trying to work some magic at my job to get the day off so I can go audition for the Pershings own in November. And I'm still thinking about West Virginia Symphony instead of Pershings, but plane tickets are getting expensive to go there. We will see, I guess!
The audition was later in the afternoon, which was nice. I took the whole day off of work, so I actually got to sleep in! I definitely appreciate sleeping past 7am now that I work at 8 every day. I carpooled with a friend, and we ended up getting to Erie (which is about 3 hours away from Rochester) about an hour early. So we just went and ate and relaxed a bit. The order of the preliminary round was determined by who got there, so we didn't want to get there too early!
I ended up being #9, which was right in the middle. I was pretty nervous, but I tried to focus my brain by reading a book and breathing deeply. It totally worked! This is something I have been struggling with for the last 3 or 4 auditions. When I went in to the audition room (which was on stage of an auditorium), I made sure to take 3 deep breaths and focused on getting rid of the "bad stuff". It really worked, I was able to play relaxed and confidently. The first round was Mozart, Shostakovich 9 3rd movement, and Beethoven 6 second movement. I played the Mozart and the Beethoven really well, but I was a little wary of the Shosty. The excerpt for the Shostakovich was actually past where I had practiced (it ended up being from the beginning of the movement to 9 bars after B!) so I was frantically practicing that part while I was warming up! Luckily they did give us the prelim excerpts in the warm up room. I still completely faked that excerpt, because it really isn't a good excerpt for me. I first played it waaaaaaaay too fast. But then the committee saved me and asked me to play it again a bit slower. Thank you! It was much cleaner the 2nd time, but there was a lot of faking still going on hehe.
Well apparently it sounded good to the committee because they asked for me to play again in the 2nd round, along with 5 or 6 others. I ended up being first in the order, which ended up being good, because I wasn't able to get nervous again. I was much more calm in the 2nd round, for sure, but I still took deep breaths before I played each excerpt. I played Pines of Rome and Mendelssohn scherzo in the second round, it was for sure my best round of the day. I used paper underneath my register key for Pines, which made it easier to maintain the soft A. It was nice.
When they announced the results of the 2nd round, I was still thinking that I was #9 for some reason although my number was now #1. So when the proctor announced that the committee wanted to hear #1 and #5 again, I was like, damn! Because I thought I hadn't made it because I was #9 haha!!! It wasn't until my friend high fived me that I remembered I was #1!! I can be so blonde sometimes.
So it was down to me and this other guy, Michael, who was from Cleveland. I just went in there and played as well as I could possibly. The excerpts were Shostakovich 9 2nd movement, and Petroushka Peasant and the Bear (!!). I tried to play as out of the box as possible, but I may have played the Shostakovitch too slow and the Stravinsky to loud because they ended up choosing the other guy as the winner. But thats ok! They asked if I would be interested in subbing because they loved my playing. I said YESSSSSS! So I hope that they call me sometime this year, I need some experience!! I really needed to do well at this audition to boost my confidence. The last 6 months or so I have been on somewhat of a downward spiral as far as my playing. I'm glad that my hard work is finally paying off!
Next audition will be Youngstown Symphony in October. I'm still trying to work some magic at my job to get the day off so I can go audition for the Pershings own in November. And I'm still thinking about West Virginia Symphony instead of Pershings, but plane tickets are getting expensive to go there. We will see, I guess!
September 6, 2009
On to the next...
So I submitted my Army Band tape...and guess what? After all that stress about getting it recorded, it was rejected. Tres lame. Ben called me at work on Friday which is when we got the letter in the mail. I felt really shitty for the rest of the afternoon, oh well. But I had to get over it because I was going into Eastman that afternoon after work to have a lesson with Mr. Grant. I was really nervous about going in to play for him, I was worried that I would totally suck, since the last time I've played for people hasn't turned out so good. (flashback - Glens Falls audition!)
Well good news! I guess I played really well because Mr. Grant thought it was the best I'd ever sounded! I was a little nervous going in, but once I got into it I was fine. It was exactly the confidence booster I needed, especially after getting the letter from the army the same afternoon. I felt like finally I was doing something right! Thank god. Now hopefully I can keep it up until Thursday, I'm auditioning for the Erie philharmonic. Luckily I won't psych myself out like the last couple times I've had auditions. Stay calm Sandy, that's all. I think this week I'm going to practice my excerpts after getting on the elliptical (which we are still trying to sell, ha!) so I can get my heart pumping so simulate myself being a ball of nerves which I probably will be. I didn't used to be so bad, but I think now I feel I have more pressure because I'm done with school.
I hope that I get some sort of reward soon, I've been working my ass off for how many years? I think I'm ready for some non-failure please, thanks.
Well good news! I guess I played really well because Mr. Grant thought it was the best I'd ever sounded! I was a little nervous going in, but once I got into it I was fine. It was exactly the confidence booster I needed, especially after getting the letter from the army the same afternoon. I felt like finally I was doing something right! Thank god. Now hopefully I can keep it up until Thursday, I'm auditioning for the Erie philharmonic. Luckily I won't psych myself out like the last couple times I've had auditions. Stay calm Sandy, that's all. I think this week I'm going to practice my excerpts after getting on the elliptical (which we are still trying to sell, ha!) so I can get my heart pumping so simulate myself being a ball of nerves which I probably will be. I didn't used to be so bad, but I think now I feel I have more pressure because I'm done with school.
I hope that I get some sort of reward soon, I've been working my ass off for how many years? I think I'm ready for some non-failure please, thanks.
August 14, 2009
Epic fail
So my recording session on Wednesday was really tragic. I COULD NOT play the last page of the Weber cleanly to save my life. Granted, when I went back to listen it wasn't all that bad, but still not very usable. Not something I want to send to the Army.
So I was going to go back tonight (Friday) to record some more....little did I know that the East End Festival was happening tonight, so I would have to pay to park in the garage by the school. Luckily I heard it on the radio and I didn't actually get all the way downtown before learning about this. Long story short, I did not get in my recording session. Which means I am going to have to go sometime next week which I did NOT want to do. And that means I'll probably have to put in a practice session sometime this weekend, impending on my precious married girl time. ARGH.
I did experiment a bit with artificial reverb on my computer....and I decided that it is not really worth risking sending a doctored recording. Plus it totally sounds fake because my software is free. *Sigh*
Why, even when I try not to, do I end up doing everything at the last minute?
Grrrrrr.
So I was going to go back tonight (Friday) to record some more....little did I know that the East End Festival was happening tonight, so I would have to pay to park in the garage by the school. Luckily I heard it on the radio and I didn't actually get all the way downtown before learning about this. Long story short, I did not get in my recording session. Which means I am going to have to go sometime next week which I did NOT want to do. And that means I'll probably have to put in a practice session sometime this weekend, impending on my precious married girl time. ARGH.
I did experiment a bit with artificial reverb on my computer....and I decided that it is not really worth risking sending a doctored recording. Plus it totally sounds fake because my software is free. *Sigh*
Why, even when I try not to, do I end up doing everything at the last minute?
Grrrrrr.
August 12, 2009
Recording time
Going to go to Eastman and use a big room to record my Field Band stuff tonight. I'm feeling positive, I'm hoping that I can get some good takes. I'm leaving Friday night open for another recording session, but I really don't want to, so I'm going to try to get some final recordings done tonight. But you never know, my Weber can be temperamental sometimes.
Wish me luck!
Wish me luck!
August 10, 2009
First one!
So this is going to be my blog about my struggles, successes, and failures about trying to make it as a classical clarinetist, as a post graduate. I find that I have a lot to talk about, but nobody to really talk about it to (well except my husband, but he's a tuba player so he doesn't count!)
Right now I am fresh off finishing my Masters degree in clarinet performance at Eastman. I honestly don't know what is next for me, but I plan on doing something clarinetty and non-schooly (at least for awhile). Unfortunately, to pay the bills, I am working at the U of R hospital as a secretary (I shouldn't really say "unfortunately" because I really don't mind my job, and I am extremely grateful to have one), and it definitely limits my ability to take all the auditions I would like to (and there are plenty of them right now!!!). So for right now I'm sticking to the military bands, I seem to do better in those auditions than the orchestral ones....plus there's the added perk of possibly getting my massive loan sum paid off if I win a job there.
My last two auditions were not so successful, and it kind of put me in a sour mood when anyone mentioned clarinet for awhile. Especially my last audition, I was embarrassed of how I played, really. I felt like since the last time I made it past a prelim round back in February I've been on a decline; every audition seems to get worse and worse! That last audition in Glens Falls, I felt was my breaking point! I decided to re evaluate my practice routine and even my audition routine. Pretty much I decided to start over. It took me almost a month, but I figured out that I was doing while I was in school will not work now that I am not.
I'm finding it a challenge to work 8 hours, exercise @ the pool, and then come home and practice for 2-3 hours without going crazy. But I'm trying to make it routine, because I don't want to be stuck in a 9-5 job for the rest of my life (and I need to pay the bills and want to stay in shape). Like I said, I don't mind my job right now, but I'd much rather be doing something else. Anyway, I've been at it for about a month and a half, and far so good, although sometimes practicing just doesn't happen. For example, last Thursday, when I decided to wait in line for a free burrito for an hour instead of practice....
So right now I'm working on making a tape for the Army Field Band audition. The audition is Sept 29th, and it is all expense paid invite depending on your recording. I've been working on three selections, Weber 2nd concerto third movement (but only the opening and the last page), mendelssohn scherzo, and Brahms 3 2nd movement. I decided to base my selections on 1) make it all on Bb clarinet and 2) what I would expect to see in a preliminary round. I snuck into Eastman last week and recorded some, and it sound pretty good! I don't think I'll use any of it (I can make it better!), but it was a really good start. The last page of the Weber has been the bane of my existence for a long time, and it is finally starting to sound somewhat clean. I'm going to go record some more this week, so hopefully I'll get some useful tracks. I need to send off my audition packet next week. Then its crossing of the fingers hoping that they will pick me to come audition live!
Right now I am fresh off finishing my Masters degree in clarinet performance at Eastman. I honestly don't know what is next for me, but I plan on doing something clarinetty and non-schooly (at least for awhile). Unfortunately, to pay the bills, I am working at the U of R hospital as a secretary (I shouldn't really say "unfortunately" because I really don't mind my job, and I am extremely grateful to have one), and it definitely limits my ability to take all the auditions I would like to (and there are plenty of them right now!!!). So for right now I'm sticking to the military bands, I seem to do better in those auditions than the orchestral ones....plus there's the added perk of possibly getting my massive loan sum paid off if I win a job there.
My last two auditions were not so successful, and it kind of put me in a sour mood when anyone mentioned clarinet for awhile. Especially my last audition, I was embarrassed of how I played, really. I felt like since the last time I made it past a prelim round back in February I've been on a decline; every audition seems to get worse and worse! That last audition in Glens Falls, I felt was my breaking point! I decided to re evaluate my practice routine and even my audition routine. Pretty much I decided to start over. It took me almost a month, but I figured out that I was doing while I was in school will not work now that I am not.
I'm finding it a challenge to work 8 hours, exercise @ the pool, and then come home and practice for 2-3 hours without going crazy. But I'm trying to make it routine, because I don't want to be stuck in a 9-5 job for the rest of my life (and I need to pay the bills and want to stay in shape). Like I said, I don't mind my job right now, but I'd much rather be doing something else. Anyway, I've been at it for about a month and a half, and far so good, although sometimes practicing just doesn't happen. For example, last Thursday, when I decided to wait in line for a free burrito for an hour instead of practice....
So right now I'm working on making a tape for the Army Field Band audition. The audition is Sept 29th, and it is all expense paid invite depending on your recording. I've been working on three selections, Weber 2nd concerto third movement (but only the opening and the last page), mendelssohn scherzo, and Brahms 3 2nd movement. I decided to base my selections on 1) make it all on Bb clarinet and 2) what I would expect to see in a preliminary round. I snuck into Eastman last week and recorded some, and it sound pretty good! I don't think I'll use any of it (I can make it better!), but it was a really good start. The last page of the Weber has been the bane of my existence for a long time, and it is finally starting to sound somewhat clean. I'm going to go record some more this week, so hopefully I'll get some useful tracks. I need to send off my audition packet next week. Then its crossing of the fingers hoping that they will pick me to come audition live!
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